Readers Forum

All your messages sent to me at andrew@thaigirl2004.com for this Readers Forum have been posted here unedited (except where you’ve asked for names or other info to be kept private). Publishing a novel is like dropping a coin down a deep well and hearing no splash, so it lights up my day when I get an email from you, even with the briefest of comments. The book is very dear to me, so I always reply to you and some of my replies are posted below. If “Thai Girl” said something to you, if you loved it or loathed it, or if you have thoughts on any aspects of Thailand that Ben confronts in his travels, I really want to hear from you. So please do put finger to keyboard and send me an email as soon as you can.

Andrew Hicks.

Recent Messages About Thai Girl

To: andrew@thaigirl2004.com

Message 58.

Hi Andrew,

After reading "Thai Girl" I thought, "Well, this guy's been around Thailand for sure.'

Then going through the reader's comments I have to say that they pretty much
capture my thoughts and feelings about the different characters. Although I have
to say that I liked Jack Russell as one of the standouts.

I could not help thinking that he's a kind of mythologial figure, a messenger, a
guide of sorts on the path of Ben's life. (Jack Russell's are a breed of dog, as
I'm sure you know). As an animal, man's best friend, and all that. I think he
helped Ben with some conflicts. Jack's own job and history spans and reflects our
own life-cycle, from youth to death. So again, the messenger himself (not a
Christian take here, thank-you) is a being who has seen a lot of things and has
an understanding (and compassion) for it all because he has walked in both world's, including
the one that Ben has just been introduced to.

A movie? Yes, please. A continuing story? I'd love to read it.

Thanks again for a good book. A nice introduction for me at so early a stage in my life in Thailand, and for one about as green as Ben!

Sincerely,

Barry

Message 57.

Dear Andrew:

I just finished reading your book "Thai Girl." I pretty much read it
in one gulp, as I could not put it down.

I spend every summer in Southeast or East Asia. Been to Thailand many
times. You captured the essence of Thailand and its people,
incredibly well, especially as to how farang might best be able to see
them.

And, most importantly, yours is an honest account and characterization
of how any farang man with a good heart and with good intentions
(while myopic) will want to be a knight in shining armor and rescue at
least one of the young girls of Thailand that are born into poverty, and who
must do whatever they can to make ends meet, and yet are still able to
maintain a giggly and positive outlook on life. But alas, the reality of farang
heroics of this kind is going to be, pretty much inevitably,
undermined by the stupid reality of a social divide.

If you don't mind a plea from a stranger: there can NOT be a sequel to this book, at
least not one with a happy ending. The end to your book is truly
where this story ends, which is sadly, for both Ben and Fon.

Regards,

Ken Kim.

Message 56.

Hi Andrew,
I have to say, I have never been so excited whilst reading a novel as I was
'Thaigirl". I read all of the book in only 4 days which was a complete surprise for
me as it usually takes me months to finish one book.

I was hooked reading it. i could hardly wait to know what would become of Ben and Fon.
I was finding it frustrating everytime Ben and Fon would get close, only to have
something happen to divide them again.

The ending was also something that caused me to have great mixed emotions. I was
disapointed with the ending at first. I think I was expecting some sort of fairytale
ending between Ben and Fon. After having a bit of time afterwards to think about the
book, i realised that the ending was actually the best way for this story to end.

I could just imagine how Fon would have been feeling, waiting for Ben, thinking of
him everyday. Was the ending intended to make it end up just as a holiday romance
for Ben? He did seem a lot more concerned about himself on getting back to
England then what he was while on holiday.

I read some of the readers comments in the forum set up on the website. I must say I
would like it so much to be able to have an open forum where we could all discuss the
book with each other. There were quite a few comments that I would like to be able
to discuss openly.

I have visited a few countries in South East Asia and I think your book is so spot
on with the way I've experienced these countries as well. I too had a
holiday romance while I was trekking through Philippines. It was great and quite
possibly one of the happiest times of my life. Simply it was amazing.

While walking through Singapore airport on the trip home, I came across your book.
It struck me straight away, as I share the same name and age group with the
main character "Ben" which helped me in deciding to buy the book.

I too feel like Ben, in the way he felt about his relationship with Fon. I felt it
improbable that I would see this girl again as it was just too hard for us to be
together. Since being home I haven't been interested in anyone else and find that I
feel now that maybe somehow I could make it work.

Anyway i didn't really want to tell you my story as you must hear quite a few stories
from guy's saying that they have found love in the same way as Ben But I do want to say thank you for writing this book; it really did touch me and found its way into the sensitive side that I have and usually hide from the world.

I hope a scriptwriter picks up on your book and decides to make a screenplay from it.
I really could see a movie made of this story and think maybe it would be a hit with
some sort of cult following. I will again read this book soon as I would like to see
if there was anything I didn't pick up on the first time.

Thank you Andrew for this inspiring novel which has touched me so and will remain
proudly on my bookshelf until the day I die.

Best wishes,

Benjamin. Australia.

Message 55.

Hi Andrew

Just got back to my home country (Denmark) after 2 months journey in
Thailand and Malaysia, whereof I spent one month in Isaan, and like Ben, I
also fell for a thai girl.

Your book taught me a lot about Thailand and Thai culture, it also helped me
to understand my girlfriend better.

I borrowed the book from my friend, before we left for Koh Samet, where I
then read most of Thai Girl. It was a strange, almost uncanny, feeling
sitting right there on Koh Samet and reading what could almost be called my
own story, because like Ben, of course I also had to leave my girl, and just
get on the plane. And she also is from Isaan, and her parents are rice
farmers, like so many other girls that foreigners meet I guess.

Although a few of the conversations seemed a bit unrealistic to me, I think
Thai Girl is a straight forward and well written story and not only is the
story engaging, but we also learn something from it, even though at first it
might seem like a poolside read about some dull romance.

The next time I go to Thailand, which might be more or less permanently, I
will bring a copy of Thai Girl and read it a second time, and hopefully a
sequel or something similar.

All the best to you!

Greetings
Malte

Message 54.

Dear Andrew

I found that your novel captured the complexities of the Thai-Farang relationships very well.

I originally avoided Thai Girl because I thought it was just another book about prostitutes, but it presented both sides with more depth than other books in the genre.

It was a wise move to cast the main female character as a low-educated massage therapist, rather than some conniving stereotype.

You also tapped into the one element that is usually forgotten - the consequence and aftermath of the farang going back home. Most books about Thai-farang relationships fail to acknowlege the impact of the visiting tourist.

Also, thank you for leaving some parts ambiguous. It was a treat to not have it all spelled out in advance. While reading Thai Girl , you kept me wondering if the female character had hidden ulterior motives and if the male character was being sincere or naive. It made the ride of reading go much more smoothly when I didn't know where the path would lead.

Ken

Message 53.

Dear Andrew,

I really enjoyed your book. Are you in the process of writing another one?

Steve.

Dear Steve,

Thanks a million. It's funny how good it feels that somebody likes my book!

In fact I'm writing a book that I hope to call, 'My Thai and I', my Thai of course being my wife. It's about living out here in the back of beyond in the NE of Thailand and I've put some experimental pieces on www.thaigirl2004.blogspot.com. I'd love you to have a look at the blog which has gone down pretty well as the top hitting Thai-based blog listed on www.thailandvoice.com. The instant satisfaction of seeing one's blog and photos appear on the screen is amazing even if in fact nobody reads it at all.

All the best and please pass on the word about 'Thai Girl',

Andrew

Message 52.

Message 52

Hi Andrew,

I've recently read your book, 'Thai Girl' on holiday in Thailand. It brings tears of joy and
tears of laughter and how true it is to real life. Is there another book about your true life, of farang meeting Thai girl? And is your story based upon you and your Thai wife? I'd love to know. Anyway it's certainly a very good read. I do hope there's another book coming. I'm visiting Thailand again this year as I love the people and their culture.

Hoping to meet you one day.

Jane

Dear Jane,

It's great to hear that you enjoyed "Thai Girl'. Most of the readers who write to me seem to be men who find that the story reflects their own experiences, but as a strong theme of the book is what it's like to be a woman in Thailand, I hope there's something in it for everyone.

Of course authors always get asked if their story is autobiographical and they generally deny it! But no, in fact I met my Thai wife just at the time I was finishing the final draft of the book so it's not our story at all.

If a story of love and longing and loss is to be convincing, then it must to an extent be autobiographical… for the author to have experienced these emotions. However, in my case the story of Ben and Fon is not specifically my story, though of course I cannot deny falling in love with and in Thailand. Most of the characters in the book including Fon are based on real people I've met there and whose essence I distilled into my notebooks, but with regard to the prototype for Fon, Ben's experiences were ones that might have happened to me but never in fact did.

Some of my readers credit me with special insight into relationships between farang and Thais but really I deny any such as my experience is quite limited. The story of Ben and Fon, is simply the natural playfulness of a Thai woman, tempered by her suspicion of foreign men interacting with Ben's hormonal passion for an exotic and utterly beguiling woman. She's always saying come hither but she doesn't always mean it, nor even herself know if she means it. For the farang male, that's what makes a cross-cultural relationship so utterly, so intolerably exciting.

Do pass on the book to your friends, and hoping to see you in Thailand again.

Andrew

Message 51.

Dear Mr.Hicks

I just finished reading your book "Thai Girl" and having a Thai daughter in law myself I could very well relate and identify with your well expressed content of that mysterious culture. I have visited Bangkok a few times with my son, but unlike Ben I was surrounded with Thais and not farangs. On my next visit I intend to acquaint myself with the many farangs, yes, of all shapes and sizes that abound in this phenomenal city.

Now, having said the above, I have to take you to task on some of the
dialect you used. I have been away from England for many years and I am finding it difficult to believe that today's travelers from the old country(ies) still used the outmoded expressions such as "doss house" "prat", "pommy", "brilliant." I do know people from England of advanced age who still say "brill" or "brilliant: but I thought this was now a worn out expression such as "chilled out" which you have also used in your book. And of course, I know older Americans who still use that outmoded overworked expression, but really is it not true that these expressions usually have their time and are then discarded for the newer "in" version.

Please tell me that the Youth - the hope of our future - are really not submerged in this verbal time warp?????

Please, "Jumping Joe Jackson" Say it isn't true.

Looking forward to your comments on the above. And again, thank you for the insight, which only served to confirm what I sensed is the elusive corpus of Thai girls - beautiful creatures born to please farangs - and they do it so well.

Keep the good stories coming,

Sincere Best Wishes for 2007. Maybe see you in Thailand later this year.

Mary Cina



Dear Mary,

Thanks so much for your very specific lit crit about colloquialisms in Thai Girl. I really appreciate it because it's the first I've had as readers usually focus on the wider themes.

You've hit on some interesting points and maybe you're right... maybe too it betrays my age! In fact I did work quite hard on the colloquialisms as a friend suggested to me that with so many characters taking part in some fairly static in-bar dialogues, it was important to create a distinctive voice for each of them. Some of the walk-on parts are not too significant and if as a result they took on an element of caricature, I wasn't too worried.

Fon was the key of course and I studied the argot of migrant workers who'd learned their English from tourists with alacrity. In fact much of her language usage is based on the construction of how she would say the same thing in Thai. Stuart, the Scot was easy, as was Clarissa, the knobby Brit. For Maca, I traveled throughout Australia listening hard and adding to the dictionary of Strine that I bought there. I made a list of expressions that I liked and ticked them off as Maca uttered them so that he didn't over-use any. I've met quite a few traveler and other Aussies who, in the presence of non-Aussies tend to assume a faux 'Crocodile Dundee' persona and take the piss, especially of a middle class pommie bastard like Ben. I must've been called a pommie a million times!

Jack Russell, the thinking man's sex tourist from Yorkshire had some language put in his mouth from a Yorkshire dialect I found on the web. Which I suppose leaves the problem of Chuck, Emma and Ben! As for Chuck, I've been amazed with younger Americans I've met, just how archaic their slang can be. I think of a lad I found myself walking with in the mountains of Cameron Highlands in Malaysia shortly before I wrote the book. It's bad news for you, Mary, but yes, everything was cool, chilled out and like crazy man. I kinda got a feelin' I was in some sorta time warp. He was twenty two!

My recent experience of young Brits is of my own kids who are contemporaries of Emma and Ben and of ten years lecturing to that age group at the green welly University of Exeter in the west of England. I've listened pretty hard and taken notes, and again you'd be amazed how reactionary their colloquialisms were. If 'brill' might be a bit naff, 'brilliant' was still current. I asked my son Mike to read a draft of the book with the dialogue particularly in mind and he did excise a few 'isms that were too dated, and he had a good laugh at my expense. But the ones you mention slipped past him.

What you say is probably right and I may have over-used my dialect palette, though I did want Ben to be a distinctly upper middle class lad from a slightly plummy background of private school privilege, precisely the sort Maca might take the piss of as a bloody pom. Emma's language is, I hope a bit more grounded in the present, with some of it pretty blunt and down to earth. I believe, from memory that a prat is a pregnant fish.

Well, thanks again and do get in touch when next in Thailand. It would be good if our paths could cross. I hope your son has read 'Thai Girl' and do pass it on to your friends, even if at risk of polluting their minds with some frightfully outdated colloquialisms!

Andrew

Message 50.

Hi Andrew,

I have recently finished your fantastic novel Thai Girl. I found so many things in your book that struck home to own personal involvement with Thailand and Thai people. My current situation is that I have a Thai Girlfriend who I have known now for 2 years.

My Journey started after meeting a Thai lady whilst still here in England which resulted in me getting my heart broken. We remained friends but one of the reasons for breaking up was my lack of understanding of Thai culture, I just could not understand why she always wanted to help her family and did everything when her brother did nothing, Now I fully understand.

To get over my heartache I booked a 2 week holiday to Thailand to Bangkok and Pattaya, at this point I had no understanding of the sex industry and what went on. I then found out all the truths 3 days before departure whilst looking on the internet. When I went to Pattaya my eyes were truly opened.

I have to admit that I did have my share of girls before one night going into a well known go go club where I came across my now girlfriend. We then spent the rest of my holiday together and when my time came to go back to Bangkok we left together. The inevitable day came and we had to part and that time I must say that I felt like Ben and Fon, sad and hurt. I was telling my teeruk that I will be back in Feb 05. The look in her eyes stays with me to this day (I hope so but I will not hold my breath). This you explained in your book with Ben and Fon I guess she wanted him to return but thought it would never happen.

After my return I went about my life and we exchanged e-mails. i was ok but I did remember thinking I wonder if she will ever stop working in the go go bar. I duly returned in feb 05 and then that's when the love really kicked in as I think then she thought more of me than just another customer. Since then I have been back to Thailand 6 more times and leaving tomorrow to see my love again.

The moment for me that made up my mind that she was special was that my girlfriend never asked me for any money when we were apart. i knew that she had other customers that were sending her money for her love and one man even asked her to marry him, but she never asked me for it. Then one day she felt the need to ask as her mother was sick, the pain in her voice was sad and of course i had to help. She still held true to her thoughts that maybe she could have both love and someone too provide for her family. My girlfriend had a vision like many girls from Issan to make enough money for a new house for her mother and to look after her.

The time that we were apart was sometime very painful as we talked every day on the phone and she would call me after work to tell me that she had to go with a
customer, this i found very difficult as although i understood why, it still hurt my heart.

Then came the time that I had to ask her when she would stop working and after we talked she agreed that she would stop earlier this year. My girlfriend has not been working in the bar scene since June and we are now discussing our future together. I am looking forward to going home to Ubon in Feb as this will be the first time that I will meet my girlfriend's Mother. She would not take me whilst she was working and until she was sure that I would be around for ever. I guess that she did not want to be seen with a falung and then not get married?

Reading your book brought out all the emotions that i have felt over the past 2 years. The hardest thing i find is how to explain to others the reasons why these girls enter this way of life. i personally have a lot of time for them as they really are amazing. The majority would choose another way of life if the opportunities were there that we have in the west, but they are not, so they do the best they can to provide for the family. Could you imagine an English girl doing all that to provide for their mother??

I too, like many of your readers, wished for a happy ending and yes it brought tears to my eyes, I think more for the fact that I was missing my girlfriend. I have passed the book onto friends to read in the hope that they can understand the way of life, and what drives the girls to do this work. My next big challenge is to get married and then face my parents when I get asked, 'So where did you meet her then'?

Keep up the good work Andrew and i will keep checking back for Thai Girl 2. I will also buy another copy for my Thai friends to get their thoughts on your story.


Martin (35) England

Message 49.

Hi Andrew
I have just finished your book and confess that as much as I wanted to like it, I regret that I found it quite repetitive and quite boring. I did however love the political views in the conversations between the travelers, and that is what kept me reading.

I found the character of Ben to be idealistic, hypocritical and perhaps for me, unbelievable. I have never met a young man who talks of love to a ladyman while in Thailand. Ben was too romantic in the book and this made it too unbelievable for me. His relationship with Fon was repetitive and at one point I put the book down as I was feeling so uninterested in their repetitive relationship. Luckily I picked it back up to be rewarded with wonderful pages of the politics of Bush, war and globalisation which were so wonderful and found that the book was only saved by those few pages. The conversations between the travelers was the highlights to the book.

I purchased the book on leaving Singapore after a couple of weeks in
Thailand. I am sorry to say that I think, for me, it was too bogged down in an uninteresting romance.

I am sorry to say this, but I believe that you show in the conversation
pieces that you have wonderful political views that I think the world need to hear and not hide them in the midst of an uninteresting romance. I hope that you concentrate on the political side that you so wonderfully narrated throughout the book, then publish that and let me be the first one to read it. I know I would not put the book down.

As I say, it is only my opinion and this is only my perspective and I wanted to take up the offer of emailing you with some of my views.

Cheers,
Simone

Dear Simone,

Oh well, you can't please all of the people all of the time and I'm very happy that you've said some very nice things about parts of the book, at least. And I am being totally honest when I say how much I appreciate your feedback as I find it very interesting to learn different peoples' response to the story. Your message also helps save the Readers Forum from becoming repetitive and boring because it says the diametric opposite of most previous ones. I'm particularly glad you liked the travelers' alcohol-inspired 'political' dialogues in the book as there have been several critics (all of them American)who've said this is the weakest part of the book.

Personally I'm very picky about the novels I read and frankly I enjoy relatively few of them. For example I found 'The Da Vinci Code' quite ridiculous, though the religious themes were fascinating. Certainly a novel sometimes can be redeemed by politics or religion though in my opinion, very rarely by sex.

Okay, so you didn't believe in hypocritical Ben as he was far too romantic, though other readers do seem to get very involved with his passion for Fon. One tough Aussie told me how he was reading the book at work and had to go outside so his staff couldn't see how much it was affecting him!

So you've never personally come across the soft, feminine side that causes us men sometimes to make such fools of ourselves?! I respect what you say, but I don't think Ben's obsessive love for Fon is so atypical for an inexperienced young lad; though Clarissa, the posh English lawyer simply puts it down to lust! He is simply following our western traditions of courtship, wallowing in love and sighing from afar for his lady, something that the Thais never begin to understand. He wants Fon to love him in the purest way possible too, though if Jack Russell is right, she'll be more interested in his wallet and on that score he doesn't do too well at all. Fon always tells Ben that passionate love is dangerous, but perhaps in the end she loses control of her emotions and suffers as a result.

Western men can certainly be bewitched by Asian women and sometimes, despite an apparently unlimited choice, they are romantic enough to fall for one woman and to want that one only. If you need any evidence just how romantic men can be, you have to look no further than the story of Robin in the previous Message 48 on this Forum.

Finally, no, I'm sorry I haven't written anything political, though how about corporate law? If that tickles your fancy, why not Google 'hicks and goo company law'. It'll be great for insomnia and it's got absolutely nothing in it about romantic men, though even we lawyers can be romantic sometimes!

With my best wishes and thanks,

Andrew

Message 48.

Hi Andrew

I have just this minute finished the book and i had to write an email just simply as this book was amazing and a subject so close to my heart.

I am currently in Thailand and in fact living with my girlfriend who was and is a bar girl. Our story was very much similar to Ben and Fon's and for me being only 21, the difficulties of a young relationship over here are very hard.

The difference obviously being that mygirlfriend was not shall we say as lucky as Fon and did not find an alternative to working in a bar. But she is a happy girl from Isaan, always looking to provide for her Mother.

I thought you captured stereotypes brilliantly in the main characters, while making Fon respectable yet very poor. This i would say is a rareity over here because many girls have no choice but to work in a bar. However i don't quite think the book captured their view on sex and the sex trade. For instance it is accepted by almost every girl's father over here, and in fact encouraged that she works in a bar. Sex is very liberal. They separate themselves from sex with a customer and very often act as though it doesn't happen and have regular boyfriends. My girl does not go with customers, though she has before and it is part of life i have to accept.

I liked the way Ben was a typical western male; in a way i found him similar to myself. I
obviously went to a bar and met my girlfriend but since speaking to her and hearing what she had to do, i find the sex trade here disgusting and vile.

Ben kept himself very well throughout the book getting drunk to forget and making new friends. And also Emma, a very typical modern western woman, demanding and not easy to read. I longed for a happy ending and really expected this book to end differently. I guess i hoped it would. I mean i remember very well when i met my girlfriend, i was staying for two weeks and after i left i did not know what to expect. I returned home to my job and home. I thought she would do the same and forget about me. I got home and called her everyday, missed her with such great pain it was unbelievable. So i quit my job and came back to Thailand.

I get by and go home every now and then, but i would do anything for this girl as love has conquered me. I had a good job and life, but love is more important to me then all that. As yet she cannot come to England and until then i come and see her. I just guess what i am saying is that i expected Ben to do something similar. Although tied down, i expected him to come home and feel the same pain i did and have to come back! I suppose i was hoping the story would end that way.

It was a great novel and as i say a story very close to my heart.There were parts i would say were slightly off, but this book is so close to what i have lived, there are going to be differences. I think there was a slight lack of emphasis on how a farang is seen in Buriram.
Visiting there quite recently to see my girlfriend's family, as a farang you are treated like a celebrity because you are classed as rich. Children follow you and point, and people on every corner try and speak to you in Thai.

Finally one thing i think that was majorly under-exaggerated was money. Thai people expect farang to pay for things not through rudeness but through culture. Farang are rich and we can go on holiday and not work, but Thai people do not. If you eat with Thai people generally as a farang you pay. When you go to meet the family you pay! I think there was a slight lack of emphasis on this part. I am sorry Andrew i have read back and it seems, taken a brilliant book and critiscised it. That is not what i am doing at all; i am just
comparing my experiences, in the hope you might be slightly interested.

I hope there may be a second installment to find out what happens if anything between Ben and Fon, as the fairytale could be complete if they can wait for each other. And anything is possible if you are willing to make it happen!

Thanks again for the book.

Many kind regards and Good Luck for the future.

Robin T.

Dear Robin,

Thanks so much for you message with your compliments which mean a lot to me and for your heartfelt story.

You say you hoped for and expected a different ending to the book but as far as the story goes, it is exactly the same as yours. What has to happen at the end of the holiday, but you get on the plane and go back home!

Ben tells Fon what you have just said to me, that you can make anything happen in life if you want to; maybe he will be as determined as you in this, but maybe not. As Emma coldly predicted, perhaps it was always likely that his family would find him a cosy career and that he has now reverted to type as a conventional middle-class guy.

Of course it's he who has all the opportunities in life, while poignantly Fon is left on the beach working from day to day, waiting for a letter and hoping that her worst fears have not materialised.

Yes, Ben is devastated at leaving her, but as the theme of the story is perhaps of hopeless love, longing, separation and loss, it would have been a sell-out if I'd let them sail off into the sunset together. But it's never over till it's over and who knows what will
happen to them!

Yes, it's, true Thai/Lao culture has a long tradition of taking a minor wife, even one taken for only an hour or two. You call the bar scene 'disgusting and vile', so can the girls really be totally immune to all of that?

Certainly some parents now hope for girl children as they are more dutiful and make better money than men, who are often drunks and wasters. They may also sell their daughters or connive at their new life, if the money keeps flowing back to them. But sometimes if it is
her choice to work in a bar, she may keep it as secret as possible.When she goes back to the village, everyone will smile at her but they may envy her money as well as despise her and there will be vicious talk. The farang, not speaking Thai/Lao/Khmen/Suay, you will miss all
that!

There is a genuine modesty among Thai women and who knows what it takes to display yourself naked every night and to be available to every grotesque old bloke without the option to say no. You will never hear anything of this though, because it is not the Thai way to talk about it; the trauma will simply be smoothed over. You may thus get the impression that offering sex for sale is not a big deal. (Though see one of the earlier messages on this Forum where a Thai talks of the long-term trauma of being a bar girl.)

Finally, Ben does attract a lot of attention when they go to the village, such as on the local bus, the inevitable implication always being drawn by the Thais. And yes, the money thing is not made a lot of in the book, but Ben always pays for everything, doesn't he, and Fon and Jinda do quite nicely out of him with a free trip home to see Mama, all expenses paid.

So to finish, follow your dream, mate and good luck to you. It'll always be one of the greatest experiences of your life. It's extraordinary the fascination we and the Thais seem to have for each other.

Anyway, tell everyone about "Thai Girl" and do keep in touch. You wanted to know how my story ends and I want to know about yours!

Andrew

PS. Your email to me had no subject and I nearly deleted it with the thirty or so spams I get every day. Do make sure and mark it Thai Girl if you write again.

Message 47.

Dear Andrew,

I've just completed your novel: Thai Girl. Very poignant, emotional and a great read. It's a very touching story. Not what I was expecting at all (after reading Bangkok 8 and Tattoo by Burdett). While I was reading your book, I imagined that the smart, scheming Fon was stringing along love-struck, naive Ben. But in the end, well, he turned out to be a flakey young farang.

I thought the story was a well-weaved misdirect and,at the same time, very symbolic of what could happen to thailand's tourism industry when Burma becomes the next 'in' tourist destination, as mentioned by one of your book's characters.

Thai Girl would make a great movie. I hope someone has been smart enough to snap up the film rights. I laughed outloud at Odin's comment about David slaying Goliath with his g-string.

Good luck with all your future creative ventures.

Cheers,

Peter

Dear Peter,

Thanks so much for your message with your very kind thoughts about "Thai Girl".

You say the book wasn't what you were expecting and I wonder which publisher's version you read. The book cover as sold in Thailand is rather more lurid than the one published in Singapore (see www.thaigirl2004.com) and they might raise different expectations. I wonder which one represents the book better and would love to know what readers think.

And yes, a movie! Of course I agree with you, it could be a great movie, though the ending is hardly classic Hollywood.

Did you ever see 'Hideous Kinky', a delightful low budget film with Kate Winslett. In the spirit of the sixties she bums off to Morocco with her two little girls and has an affair with a Moroccan boy. It's never likely to come to anything and at the end she just has to leave him and go home. A Romeo and Juliet theme where two totally different people are hopelessly drawn to each other and then torn apart can be very moving. Some people think the ending of "Thai Girl" is a bit of an anti-climax while others say that the emotional climax is when Ben leaves Fon on the island which tugs at their heart strings. As in
'Hideous Kinky' it could make a powerful ending to a movie.

Well, thanks again and do tell your friends about "Thai Girl". >

Andrew

Message 46.

Dear Khun Andrew,

I am Jann, a 18 year-old Dentistry student at Khon Kaen University, Thailand. I bought your novel a year ago or so when I was in secondary school, by chance of stumbling into it in a book shop in Don Muang airport. The reasons to buy the novel were so simple: its cover and of course it's about a 'Thai girl'..which I thought might have something to do with my surroundings and me' Because of my Admission exam and geting into university, I had to put your novel down and turned to my textbooks.....

I have just finished reading your novel by now and like other readers said--It's brilliant! However, it seems to me that the novel doesn't cover all the characteritics of "a Thai Girl" that appears as its title ....obviously the novel mentions about Isaan girls mainly. And I understand why that is. Isaan is a so called poorest part of Thailand, but the richest part in humor and smiles. If you had noticed, most of Thai comedians are from Isaan. Most of us have hard lives....so it's kind of a smile to hide the pain. We have to be happy and learn to be satisfied with all the things we have, and live our lives peacfully.

However as the capitalised economy comes closer and closer and now totally surrounds us, we cannot possibly stay cool and live easy like a 'slowly blowing wind'. Captivated by the colour of the modern cities and technologies, money is a big deal to everyone. You could die poor by starvation if you're not energetic and get used to doing things fast and pulling tricks to make money like people in the city. But how could uneducated people in Isaan do something like that. They fall behind, don't know much about new technologies and what's going on in this world, except worrying about 'will there be enough
rain to grow rice?'. So, if the old man is too fallen behind and too poor to support education for his next generation , what's the choice for the next generation then?..... To leave school and find work in the city is only the first thing that
springs to their mind. A boy is to be a labourer and a girl, if she has got a good mind and wants to struggle, then she might do something like Fon, but if she isn't and prefers some easier way, she might be a pretty girl in a car showroom or a prostitute...or a 'temporaly wife' for a dirty Farang.

Your novel is almost true about Isaan girls, but not always. The discussions among Farangs in your novel about Thailand and
Thai girls are interesting...and I think it would be nice if Thai people were good at English and able to speak out for themselve. It's very disappointing and upsetting about some views of Thai girls and Farangs because for some girls they think of a Farang as their Hero or Rescuer, but instead for some Farangs, they think of her as a money spender and something to relieve their sexual desire.

It's nice though to hear some bad view of Farangs toward us...If you have this novel in Thai edition, it would be really nice for us to understand Farangs and of course, to know where we stand in what way --negative or positive in Farang's opinions.

Again, the novel is great.... However, it would make me cry a river if Fon had got a sad ending. Her life is hard and misery enough. If you are planning to write part 2 of the novel, please dont let Ben break her heart, please!

Keep on an with an excellent job!

Jann.

Dear Khun Jann,

Thanks so much for your lovely message. I am always especially thrilled to receive a message from a Thai person as I have little idea how many Thais read the book and what they think of it. Yes, I'd really like to see it published in Thai because I hope that Thai readers would enjoy it as much as foreigners seem to have.

I am fascinated by your description of being young and Thai and how life can be tough in this country. As you say, things are changing so fast here and the rural people lose out all the time. Do you remember Ben and his friends talking about how Thailand is rushing too fast into a consumer society and losing some of its cultural values? And remember him standing
dreaming in the rice field in Buriram, thinking what a beautiful life it could be in the village with your extended family all around you, if only farming could give you a proper livelihood and how sad it is to see rural life breaking down as everyone floods to the cities for low paid work.

Yes, the people of Isaan represent a triumph of the human spirit, but I do hope that when they take the role of comedian, Thailand is laughing with them and not laughing at them for being 'Lao'.

Do some of the farang in the book have a low view of Thai women? Surely not! I thought they all loved the Thai people as a whole. As Maca said,he chooses to be in Thailand for the Thai people and their gentleness. Okay, at the end Emma and Ben say how sad it is that Thai women have the reputation world-wide of being available to any man who will pay them, but this is a stereotype that has arisen from the huge scale of 'adult entertainment'in Thailand. In contrast, of course, the "Thai Girl" story portrays Thais in a good light and is a about a young woman who is the opposite of that stereotype, professing traditional values that are still surprisingly strong today throughout the country.

And finally, you'll cry a river if I break Fon's heart in Thai Girl-2! I'm so pleased that you care! But at the end of the book, Ben is in London about to start a two year internship as a lawyer while Fon is still on Koh Samet waiting and wondering. Maybe her heart's been broken already!

Do please pass on the book to your friends and I'd love to hear from them too.

With best wishes to you for your studies. I hope it all goes well for you.

Andrew

Message 45.

Hi,

I enjoyed your book, thanks for writing it.

* The good: I love Thailand, the Thai people, and yes, especially Thai woman. Some have such a sweet voice, I can listen to them talk Thai all day. Your book brought back many
good memories for me.

* The bad: I was
looking more for romance between Fon and Ben...or at least one less sexually frustrating. I know that men do go to Thailand, some for the sex trade, some for the week long girlfriend experience, and some for love and marrige, and some to live in that wonderful country for years on end. However, Fon's approach to life and sex did highlight the difference between women. Some do anything for money, and some save themselves for family, love and marriage. I think this is a theme all over the world. In poor countries, there are "special" circumstances which I believe you highligted admirably.

* The ugly: Emma. Need I say more?
Well, Ben was a bit of a wanker at times too, but Emma was down right bitchy.
My friend and I had a big laugh about how she emmulates western (white) women we have known.

I often think Western women want to know what men can do for them, and Thai women want to know what they can do for men. I mean this in a broad sense, to make a man comfortable with clean clothes, food, happiness, and yes, sex. Whereas western women want to know
what a man can do for them to make their life better.

I read some where, western women want to be like men, and Thai women want to be like
women. I tend to care and treat real women more romanticly than women that want to be like men. Or as another friend of mine said, "I know when a woman is too much of a man for me."

On another note, I read you wrote a paper or small book for the Filipinos in Hong Kong. Can I get more information about what your wrote, and how you distributed it?

Kop khun khup,

David

Dear David,

Thanks for all your nice comments about "Thai Girl". I'm glad you enjoyed it and, I guess your mates read it too. Keep passing it on!

Yes, several readers have said that Emma is a wingeing !!!!!!, but don't be too hard on poor
Ben. He's still very young and wet around the ears!

I was interested in your thoughts on western and Thai women. Yes, the Thai women seem sweet and purry, but don't underestimate them for one moment. After the softening up
process, they're pretty formidable I can tell you. No passive, doe-eyed doormat, they're powerful personalities and no push-over and that's what I like them for.

My 'Filipina Helpers' Handbook' was published in Hong Kong in about 1981 and all 3,000
copies sold out in a few months. It was top of the SCM Post bestsellers' list, beating Frederick Forsyth into second place! There was a real need for it and I'm pleased to have done it. Only after I'd written "Thai Girl" did it cross my mind that the issues were much the same, of poor migrant workers leaving their villages to look for opportunities in a very tough world.

All the best,

Andrew

Message 44.

Dear Andrew,

Just a short one to say how wonderful your book was. Unputdownable as we Brits say. My wife is a teacher in Udonthani and I love the way you portrayed Thailand in such a beautifully balanced way. I am a physiotherapist in Norfolk and I get very angry (so does Ona my wife) when young men come for treatment and inform me that they are going to Thailand for a holiday because ALL Thai women are "loose". You have done a geat deal in your book to dispel that ridiculous myth. Thank you for a wonderful, and beautifully balanced book about Thailand and Thai culture!! Roll on the next one!!

Best regards

David Campbell MacKellar

Message 43.

Hey Andrew,

Great book! I especially loved they way you portrayed the character Fon. I am engaged to an Isaan girl from a small village out side of Khon Kaen, and she is very much like Fon in every way. The respect for her family, her pride, her sharp wit and humor, mood swings – it’s all spot on. She is a strong woman, but still has a fragile femininity about her which I find very attractive. Without generalizing too much, this is something I find many western women today have lost in their pursuit of absolute equality.

My fiancé was lucky enough to get a good education. Even though her family is poor, they realized she had great potential, and after making some sacrifices were able to put her through international school in Bangkok. This I guess makes her a bit more accustomed to western culture, but I love the fact that she would never compromise her Thai values. As Fon in your book, there are still aspects of her life that she is very private about. After having lived in SE Asia for a while now, I am not blind to the difficulties of a cross cultural relationship, and I think you discuss some of these problems in your book very well. Excellent food for thought!

Thanks for a great read!

Cheers,

Matt

Message 42.

Andrew

I read your book in one sitting, well actually squirming would be more
like it ! I picked up a copy in Surabaya airport whilst waiting to
return to a remote island in Indonesia. I am presently working on a
large construction project installing the basic infrastructure there. I
ended up stuck on a twin prop airplane for two hours, then a seaplane,
then a fast crew boat, then a fishing boat and then an outrigger canoe
and finally an open truck. I started the book in Surabaya at 06.00 and
inished it as the sun went down twelve hours later.

Your characters are so accurate it is obvious you have trod the path.

Ben comes accross as a total prick and one almost wishes that he finds
Fon shacked up with a fat ancient sausagebreath German at some stage,
but of course that would have ruined the whole scenario of the
innocence and purity of spirit of Fon.

Having lived, and loved, in Thailand I can emote with all of the players
in your story.

I have been resident in Indonesia for ten years and am very happily
married to a 'kampung girl' from East Java. They are far more reserved
and traditional in some ways than Thai girls, but can be earthy and
extremely hot-blooded as well. The ladies of the island of Madura are
reknowned for their physical beauty, sexual prowess and extreme
violence when crossed.

I have written several short articles about my life here, posted them
online, and all seem well received, I am therefore going to attempt to
emulate your example and write a fictional story about an East Javanese
girl. I considered Balinese but their lifestyles are much more complex.

Good luck with the follow up.

Java Geordie

Dear Java Geordie,

Thanks for your very colourful message which I was delighted to receive, not just for your nice comments but also for learning that the book is available even in Surabaya and that it sustained you through such a gruelling journey.

I'm glad you could emote with Ben even though he is 'a total prick'! Of course there are lots of these cruising Thailand, innocents abroad, and the not so innocent treading the primrose path... though don't be too tough on poor Ben. He's very young and maturer men suffer similarly when they fall in love with and in Thailand.

You're obviously an old hand in Asia and I do hope you realise your plans to write. It's been a great experience for me, and well worth it even if the book had not been published. 'Thai Girl' is totally non-biographical, as I always tell people who ask, so now I'm writing a more personal view of my life in the far rice fields of Thailand. Likewise it's fun and publication is ultimately in the lap of the gods.

Anyway keep writing and do stay in touch, and thanks again.

Andrew

Message 41.

Hi Andrew,

I have just finished reading your book, and I couldn't put it down. I
felt as if i was there in thailand, you have done an amazin job. I was
in thailand for 4 weeks in January, and I have ta say that after readin
your novel that I understand so much more. Me and my friends used to
think that all thai girls were the same and we could neva understand
how they used to sell themselves. We found them so intimidating as well,
but now I understand so much betta. I did not have many nice encounters
with the ladyboys ova there. I had one put a glass bottle to me, and
another tell me that she was married to some boy I was chatting to.

I stil dont understand why they took a disliking to me. I found it very strange how they
looked at us farang women but you explained it so well in your book. I
have more friends goin out to Thailand in afew months and I gave them
your book to read before they go, I told them that this is exactly
Thailand, that you have got it down to a t. You really have done a good
job.

Best wishes
Sinead.

ps sorry if my spellin is bad and if you cant understand some of my
slang, us Irish are terrible at writin..

Message 40 .

Hi Andrew,

You may not remember having met me in Asia Books at the Nana Square
centre (Sukhumvit Road) in January - but we had our photo taken together
in the shop (and developed on the spot). I have stuck a copy into the
frontispiece of "Thai Girl".

Ijust write to tell you how much I enjoyed your novel, which
I recently finished reading. I saved the best of the books I
brought home until last - and it lived up to expectations! Not least in
terms of excellent "production values" - quality of type and paper,
spelling and punctuation, etc. - although I have to say that some
publishers seem to cobble their productions together in an
exceedingly hasty manner. One in particular, "Lady of Isaan" by a
German chap, had a beautiful cover, but read as if it had been dictated
to someone over a bad phone line - indeed, dictated to a Thai secretary
who spoke barely any English and was writing things down on a purely
phonetic basis!

If you recall, I was with my friend Noi when I met you. We were off to
visit her family near Sisaket in Isaan the following day, and
you recommended a Khmer temple called Khao Phra Viharn on
the Cambodian border. Many thanks for that tip: we had a brilliant day
out - it was about 80 kilometres from her village. Absolutely stunning
views too - from the ledge looking out over Cambodia and Laos. The only
problem was I had to pay TWICE: once at the Thai check-point, then again
at the Cambodian one! But at least we did not need passports - despite
its being nominally on the Cambodian side, according to an American
couple we met.

When I read your novel, I found many uncanny parallels between that
day and the visit your hero makes to his Thai girlfriend's village and
to Phnom Rung - right down to the whole family (and several other
village kids) all piling into the back of the pick-up truck hired as
transport! I learnt a lot from your book about familial relations among
Thais (particularly about the matriarch's powerful position!),the
history of Isaan and its difference from other parts of Thailand, its
musical traditions,its female population, economic reasons
for migration to Bangkok, and so on and so forth. Like the couple in
your novel, we too arrived at dawn, and went to the market first thing -
followed in due course by culture shock when it came to meal-time!

All in all, your book proved "a rattling good yarn", as my father used
to say, and was well constructed. The only loose end I noticed was the
total non-reaction of the Thai Girl to the transvestite's poisonous
postcards - they seemed to make no difference to her attitude, nor did
she mention them in conversation. But maybe I missed something, and it
is NOT a loose end, after all?

Good luck with book sales!

All the best -
David

Dear Dave,

It's great to hear from you and of course I remember the photo opportunity
in the bookshop. Things like that don't happen to me every day.

I'm glad you enjoyed Khao Phra Viharn. I think it's one of the great
Khmer temples and the position on top of the cliff is spectacular. Yes,
it is in Cambodia and so both the Thais and the Cambodians exact their
tolls before you go in! I've probably been there about ten times, which
is where I got my description of Ben and Fon visiting the temple, though I
moved them west to the temple at Khao Phnom Rung.

And of coure I'm really pleased that you enjoyed the book. I was intrigued by your
mention of a loose end... that Fon never mentions to Ben anything about
the postcard he sent her written for him by Odin, the jealous restauranteur. It
was my instinct that Fon, playing haughty and hard to get as she does, would simply
not mention the post card, and that Ben, fearing what Odin might have said, wouldn't
dare mention it either. Anyway, somehow I cannot imagine a Thai saying, "Oh yes, and thank
you for the lovely postcard." Nor even "What the hell was that crap you wrote
to me on that crazy postcard?" It'll all just be smoothed over and ignored.

So do please tell your friends about "Thai Girl" and pass it on to your friends
as I want it to be read! It's number two bestseller to the Da Vinci Code
in Singapore at the moment!

I'm in Hampshire looking out at the rain for the rest of the 'summer' before heading back to Thailand. What are you up to?

Andrew

Message 39.

Hi Mr Andrew,

Your book was an excellent read, thanks! I could fully empathize with Ben in his relationship with Fon, and was also caught up in a similar situation like him, so in love with a Thai girl I've known not for all too long. Then it struck me that while being warm, friendly and ever so affectionate on the outside, their inner world is so hard to grasp to say the least. And no, I'm not much of a farang being just 2 hours away in the concrete jungle of Singapore. In the eyes of the westerner, I could just be a Thai as well. However in the eyes of the Thai, I'm just like any other tourist here on a wasteful holiday, lots of spare cash to spend and being crazy getting a tan. While left in a crazy spin and feeling dejected in the end (just like Ben was) I'm still very much in love with the country and its friendly inhabitants. I've also learnt it the hard way that cross-cultural relationships can be so absolutely difficult at times.

Cheers Andrew, for writing such a wonderful novel which i could really relate to.

Message 38.

Hello Andrew,

I did catch up with Thai Girl and thought it was very well done. You explained in a clever way how so much about Thai society is both captivating and illusory. Unlike most of the other attempts at dealing with the cultural conflicts, it gives both sides and imparts some lasting understanding. It's a credit to you. I'll be recommending it to every ignorant bastard who thinks he knows it all when it comes to matters of the heart. And there are a lot of them!

Cheers,

Alan.

Message 37.

Mr. Hicks,

Thank you for writing this book. It is easy to read because it is not boring. It is disturbing to read, at times, because of the heavy subject of Thailand’s sex industry. It spoke to me nonetheless, and that was the main reason I decided to read it.

Although Ben can be considerate, he seems rather immature, and it turns some readers like me off that he is turned on so much. Your discussion on the interactions between Thais and Westerners is probably accurate, and your ability to understand Thai culture so well
impressed me. The relatively low status of Thai women and children is one thing that bugs me about Thai culture, and thus I don’t find Thai culture beautiful, although it has some good qualities.

Much has been said about Thailand’s sex industry, and a large fraction thereof is said by Westerners who seem to have only superficial understanding of Thai society. It is nice to see a book that talks about the subject from a less biased perspective. Sorry I am reluctant to say “unbiased”; I believe that as human beings, we all have bias, although each individual’s bias varies in magnitude.

Having known someone in my childhood who was deceived and forced into prostitution, punters’ ignorance of the scale of damage their patronage has on the lives of countless innocent boys and girls often frustrates me. Some individuals choose to be in the industry, while some are forced into it. I knew the girl before she entered the trade. The guy who said he loved her suggested that they elope, and instead he took her to a brothel. She was fifteen. She could not make an escape until a year later. She can’t bear to look people she used to know in the eye again. She was from Isaan.

On a separate note, when asked by Westerners why some Thai women are reluctant to be with Westerners (and occasionally called a racist), I always have difficulty explaining. Perhaps the matter is not something you can explain adequately in a sentence or two, but a book can reasonably accommodate it.

Thanks again. Sorry if you have difficulty making sense of my writing. Learning English is a continuous process. My nationality is Thai, but my view may not be representative of that of Thai people.

Best wishes,

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

Thanks so much for writing to me as I'm particularly pleased and interested when I hear from a Thai. I'm glad you liked the book and that it said something to you.

Yes, on arriving in Bangkok, Ben is very immature and his unquestioning interest in the bar scene turns Emma off in a big way. But it's not long before he begins to think about things, and a part of the story is his journey through Thailand to a more mature undertanding of the hard realities of life here. Certainly your mention of the girl you knew from Isaan who was tricked into the sex industry is a disturbing case in point.

I am always anxious that a Thai person picking up my book will think, 'Oh no, not another opinionated Westerner lecturing us about things he doesn't fully understand.' Yes, we all have a bias or viewpoint, but I'm relieved if you think that the discussions of the characters, who are trying to understand what is going on around them, raise important issues and find an interesting balance of views.

I hope the book is broadly sympathetic to all of humanity, both Thais and Westerners, but if Westerners have something of a bad reputation among Thais, then it's probably been
well earned. As Ben says to Fon, it's all too easy for Westerners who've been working all hours during the year to fall for the 'tropical paradise' that's offered to them, to ask no questions and go wild.

So again, many thanks and do pass on the book to your friends. With my best wishes,

Andrew

Message 36.

Hi Andrew,

I have travelled to Thailand many times over many years. Your wonderful
book taught me a little more about Thailand and it's people, all
cleverly wrapped around a romance. An excellent read!

David

Message 35.

Dear Andrew,

Just returned from Bangkok where I purchased your book and did not put it down until I was finished. This book hits the nail on thehead about the ladies in Thailand. I have visited Thailand many times and lived there many years ago. My current tirak (girlfriend) and I
broke up because I would not support her acoholic father for 6000 baht per month.

It's like the movie 'Good Morning Vietnam" where Chintara Sukaphat, who is a Thai actress, tells Robin Williams 'we not same, am so different"--talk about life imitating art! Will there possibly be a movie?

Regards ,

Dennis S.

Dear Dennis,

I'm delighted that you liked the book, and yes, I think a movie could be amazing. But then I'm biased!

Is there anyone out there who knows how to find someone who'd take an interest in the idea of promoting a movie?

Andrew

Message 34.

Hi, Andrew,

I finished reading "Thai Girl" tonight and it was a good read. As an American, I was not offended by the Bush-bashing, one gets used to that, especially outside of our borders, but I do have to say I thought it was the weakest part of the book. I'm not a Bush supporter
and voted for the other side both times, but I still found it a collection of tired old cliches that took away from the story. I was glad when I got through that part and was reminded why backpackers are not my cup of tea any more.

But that said, the book is excellent, and I enjoyed it immensely. Achara will read it next, probably on Samet. I was curious about the timeline though. Ben was in Bangkok on election day when Thaksin was first elected prime minister, and that was in January 2001. But later on Koh Chang, the backpackers are talking about 9/11 as if it had happened months before;
surely Ben and Emma didn't spend a year or more over here. Since they return to Blighty during Songkran, I assume it was four months or so, and you just condensed world events a little.

It was also fun figuring out where places were. Naga Plaza was certainly not hard, but I figure the Georgia in Soi 7 was actually the Atlanta in Soi 2. I have a feeling Freddie's Massage was Annie's. Thermae's was hard to miss. The Regal was obviously the Royal.

But despite Ben's protestations to Fon about not taking a bargirl out, I found it somewhat suspicious when early in Chapter 21: "He decided to head off to Sukhumvit Road to have a few beers and see how the dice would fall." Then it's the next day; I wonder what Ben did that night! And did Penny not count as a lady when he told Fon he had not been with
anyone?

I've been in Thailand 14 of the last 18 years (next Tuesday will be the 18th anniversary of my first arrival in Thailand), and I've known many people with a similar relationship: relatively wealthy Western man meets poor, younger Isaan lady and gets married, though it's not
always so lop-sided. I'm a case in point. My wife, Achara, is from Bangkok. Her family actually is somewhat wealthier than I am. We're almost the same age: I'm 47, she's 45, and we've been married for 11 1/2 years and together for two years before that. She's better educated than I am, and we met in America, not in Thailand. We were both students at the University of Hawaii, both studying Public Health; for me it was my one and only master's degree, but it was her second master's, and she's an assistant professor at Chula now.

Well, thanks again for writing your great book. I'm sure Achara will enjoy it, too as I know her taste. It'll be a good read for a holiday on Koh Samet.

Don

Dear Don,

I was very pleased to receive your comments on the book and I'm delighted that you enjoyed reading it, perhaps even prompting your trip to Samet.

I take on board what you say about America-bashing. The story is primarily about backpackers and their perception of life generally, of Thailand, and of course the war on terror. Drawing on my notes of conversations I've had with many travellers, I tried to reflect the passion and emotion, sometimes exaggerated, that this topic evokes. I've never met an American travelling in Thailand who supported the invasion of Iraq and given that Ben and Darren argue for getting in our retaliation first, I tried to give the debate some balance. But yes, maybe it was simply too long and overdone.

Jim Eckardt who gave the book an otherwise favourable review in The Nation said exactly the same thing as you did about this bit of the book. You might have a look at "An Interview with the Author" on this website where I was accused, lightheartedly I think, of being anti-American, which I most certainly am not. If I was, I'd have put in some horrible American characters, but Chuck, the only American, is shy, sensitive and thoughtful and perhaps the nicest guy in the whole book!

Jim Eckhardt also picked up your point about the time discrepancy. I simply wanted to squeeze the Thaksin election and the Afghan invasion into Ben's short holiday! Of course you are quite right in what you say, though I put a craven disclaimer at the front of the book
admitting the distortion, which hardly lets me off the hook!

I'm glad you enjoyed playing 'spot the real hotel and bar', on which you score pretty highly. And I'm also impressed by your noticing the ambiguity of Ben's solitary nighttime visit to the sois and byeways of Sukhumvit. Of my friends who read the draft, none of them spotted
this, but I still didn't want to flag it up more prominently.

For many of the characters, there may be a gap between what they profess and the actuality and with Ben and Fon trying desperately to understand each other, this may be something that the reader finds intriguing. It's all open to the reader's interpretation, including the ending.

So I hope you enjoy Samet and pass on the word to people you meet that Sunthorn Phu is not the only writer to have featured this beautiful though threatened island!

Andrew

Message 33.

Dear Andrew,

Thank you for writing such a thought provoking novel.Although I found the storyline a little thin, I enjoyed it! Your development of the character of Fon
was excellent. On the other hand, Bens character was articularly weak.

Now the criticism. Your continual reference to Bar girls as "whores" and "sluts" I found particularly offensive and typical of conservative western thinking. Your inference that prostitutes are the same the world over and the lowest form of humanity shows a lack of understanding of the thai sex industry in general.

May I ask have you ever spent time in pattaya? I think not.

A friend of mine who back-packed around thailand (having never visited Pattaya) refered to the city as "the place where big fat German men have sex with little boys".

This generalisation is typical of westerners with a tainted and preconceived view of
Thailand, Pattaya and the sex industry. I get the impression from reading your novel that you share the view.

For your benefit and the benefit of other forum contributors who have no experience of the city, here is the reality of life in Pattaya. Depending upon the time of year there can be as many as 20,000 girls working the bars in pattaya (to you that means 20,000 whores and sluts). The majority of them are there quite simply because they have children and families to support. The majority are charming, courteous, polite, hard-working and DECENT HUMAN BEINGS.

The majority of the girls work in beer bars as opposed to short time bars and gogo bars. The vast majority of "relationships" between girls (whores and sluts) and Farang (sex tourists and drug takers) in Pattaya are long term encounters which involve companionship, friendship and dare I say the word - SEX. The Farang pay the girls for their TIME, irrespective of the fact the sex takes place or not. The overwhelming majority of Farang in Pattaya do not take drugs, do not seek sex with minors, are not sexually frustrated predators of thai girls, and in many cases are respected and wealthy individuals who above all respect and understand the bar girls. The beauty of Pattaya is its openness and honesty - a community where girls are free to carry out there business without prejudice from farang and thai alike.

On my first visit to Thailand 5 years ago I met a 23yr old degree educated accountant named Rin (name changed to protect her identity). Originally from Udon, her family sent her to university in Bangkok. After completing her education, she remained in Bangkok to work. As a junior accountant Rin earned 8000 baht per month. Rin was a virgin when we met. After spending 5 days together I gave Rin 4000 baht partly because she had used 3 days of here precious annual leave to be with me and partly because 4000 baht meant far more to her than it did to me.

Rin gladly accepted the money and remained a virgin long after we parted. In your
opinion would Rin be a whore and a slut for accepting money from me after spending time in my company? Of course not!! Similarly, neither are the vast majority of Pattaya's bar girls who take money from Farang in return for friendship, companionship and less importantly, sex.

Perhaps when you write the sequel you will take Ben and Fon to Pattaya. I'm sure they will have a great time!

Regards,

Donald, England

Dear Donald,

Thanks for letting me have your reactions to "Thai Girl". I always appreciate hearing from readers as it is fascinating for me to see the different ways in which people react to the book. What one thinks of a book is a very personal thing and for myself, I find that some highly recommended books satisfy me and some just don't.

I'm relieved that you liked Fon though; if she, the main character fails to come alive, the story's a non-starter. Strangely I think Ben is less important. He is everyman visiting Thailand for the first time with whom the reader confronts various aspects of life in Thailand and, I hope identifies to some extent.

Responding to the points you make, I am surprised that you take me to task so strongly for calling bar girls 'whores and sluts' because I don't! I can find virtually no authorial comment on the bar girls at all except physical description, sometimes complimentary, sometime not, on the rare occasions they appear. The comments that you object to must therefore be found in the dialogues between the characters. But on scanning the book, nowhere can I find anyone calling them whores or slut. In fact Ben and the others refer to them as bar girls or sex workers, generally without any critical overtones. The only exception is during the debate on the beach at Koh Samet when Samantha, a stroppy walk-on part says that the 'working girls' in Bangkok are just in it for the money and 'even look like they're enjoying it'. She has to say this because unless somebody says something negative, you can't even begin to have a discussion! Maca and Emma then put her straight in no uncertain terms, saying that many women, especially those from Cambodia, Laos and Myanmar are often forced into prostitution and that anyway it's no disgrace to be a prostitute; instead you should blame those who exploit them.

In the other major discussion on this topic, Jack Russell, the thinking man's sex tourist shows considerable respect for the sex workers. To him (at p. 152) they are 'healers and therapists' and 'members of a caring profession'. So I don't think my characters slag off the bar girls either. They see them in a sympathetic light, and if not doing this work by choice, as victims of their economic circumstances.

Ben and his companions debate the complex circumstances that lead to a booming sex industry in Thailand, though the book is not primarily about bar girls. Focussing on Fon, it exemplifies a young woman finding an independent life for herself without apparently selling sex. As a travel or backpacker novel it attempts to depict the attitude of young travelers on first arrival here, as they try to understand Thai society, including of course rural decline, urbanization and commercial sex.

Nonetheless, while not condemning the bar girls, the travellers do find the sight of a fat old farang hand in hand with a slim young Thai girl to be pretty disgusting. From my notes of many conversations over the years with those that I've met, that's exactly what they do generally think. So does that make me judgmental about the sex industry or am I merely reporting the typical attitude of western travellers?

Of the two sex tourists in the book, Stig Ruud in Chapter 6 is pretty ugly with 'a massive belly, a stubbly receding chin and piggy eyes'. Emma can hardly bear to sit next to him in the mini bus, but Stig turns out to be 'one of the more engaging characters they had met so far, proving that travelling confounds first impressions and broadens the mind'. Later on in the book, sex tourist, Jack Russell is middle-aged, short, dumpy and bald (page 151), but Ben finds him to be pleasant and thoughtful and not an evil exploiter of vulnerable young women. So they get a sympathetic write-up too.

I have also offended you by the couple of times my characters refer to Pattaya as the big sex resort, or whatever, and you ask me if I have ever been there. I first went with my wife in 1978 when Pattaya and Patpong were really wild, and I've been back many times since. Having lived in SE Asia for twenty years or so, I've been pretty much everywhere… how else could I describe the Full Moon Party for example without having experienced it. But as for Lamai, Patpong, Pattaya and Patong, I am definitely now an ex-Pat. Not being much of a drinker, I prefer the less developed resorts such as Koh Samet and Koh Chang, which is why I set the novel there.

"Thai Girl" is only a story and not a thesis, but I hope it gives food for thought without pushing any particular agenda. One reader who wrote to me (Message 10) suggested that it's strength is that it raises issues without shoving a particular point of view down the readers throat. But I'm not sure you'd agree with that opinion, which worries me.

My own view is that the longer I live in Thailand, the more I realize that broad and moralistic generalizations simply don't stand up to close scrutiny. What you see in the book is visitors from the West trying to make sense of things in Thailand from the post-Christian viewpoint that the sale of sexual services demeans both parties. Here of course there is much greater acceptance of commercial sex as a means of raising money for the family, something that first time visitors are unlikely to appreciate.

A popular novel thus cannot answer any major questions about society, but it can raise them, I hope in an interesting way. The front cover of the book reads, "Seductive, scheming and available? Or is the Thai Girl modest, sweet and innocent… is it she who is the victim?" Perhaps that is what the book is all about.

Andrew Hicks.

Message 32.
Hi Andrew

Congratulations on writing an excellent novel.  I feel that you captured the real essence of Thailand and the traditional Isan women.  I found myself not far from tears for both Fon and Ben at their parting and the dilemma they both faced in not being able to be together.

I have travelled Thailand frequently especially around the Udonthani region where my wife comes from.  She,like Fon is from a little village and made her living from selling food in the city and cleaning for more affluent families.  I think Jack was not far off in his summary of the
difference in cultures and expectations of both Thai woman and Western men.  However, it can work if you both are prepared to work at it extremely hard and learn about each others'cultures and be prepared to compromise.  I love my wife dearly and have also gained a beautiful Thai family who I also love.  My visits to my wife's village fill my soul with happiness and have taught me that you do not need money to be truly happy.  I long for the day when the Thai economy lends itself to be more rewarding to the rice farmers.  Over the years I have seen Thailand become more Westernised and I can see the problems and damage this is doing to the Thai culture.

Thanks again for an excellent read and I hope you do a follow as you've left the novel with ample opportunity for volume two.  Thanks also for showing the Isan Woman the true respect they deserve.
Andrew F.


Dear Andrew

I was really pleased to get your message with all your glowing comments about the book.  Without this, being an author is really very unrewarding as, while the sales figures are encouraging, you personal view of the book makes it all worthwhile.
   
And I really liked what you had to say.  Yes, I too believe that cross-cultural marriages are a great enterprise and can be very successful, offering each party a very special extra something, just as you describe.
   
I'm glad you felt moved by the book and that you appreciated the dignity of Fon as the representative of Thai women from Isan.  All too often, Bangkok novels are about bar girls who have of course lost much of their dignity, which is hardly something for Thailand to celebrate.
  
Neverteless, Fon is still enigmatic to the farang suitor.  I hope she is the decent, hard working woman she says she is.  But of course I don't really know; I'm only the author!
  
Do pass on word of the book and keep in touch.  Are you based in Thailand or in England?
 
Many thanks again.
Andrew.



Message 31.
Hi Andrew,
I bought “Thai Girl” in Bangkok airport on 9 October 2005. I wasn’t looking for a book to read and I saw it, read the cover and put it back on the stand. I sat down for a while and I kept thinking… will it tell me what I want to know about Thai women. I bought it and it did more than that.

This was my second time in Thailand. I was there for three weeks in June and have just spent another nine days there. You may ask why.

I am forty nine, fit and happy with my life as a teacher, having raised my son since he was four years old. He has just finished his Masters degree.

I have been to Bali many times and love it and people told me to try Thailand. A colleague in Darwin has a Thai wife and they have been together for twenty years. I wanted to see the real people of Thailand, so in July I traveled to her village in Khon Khaen which they were visiting for the first time in sixteen years. I had two nights in Bangkok first and didn’t much like it and couldn’t wait to get to the village. I stayed a week with them in the village and I was in heaven. We were the farangs of the village and I loved it even more because I was single. Believe me, it was like being a king.

Anyway after a week being the centre of attraction, it was time to explore some more of Thailand. They took me to Khon Kaen bus station to catch a bus to Chiang Mai. They headed off and I had about two hours to kill so just sat at the terminal and waited. After about thirty minutes I started to talk to this very beautiful Thai lady who is twenty two and was going off to Pattaya. When it was time for the girl to get her bus, she gave me her mobile number and said to ring her when I get to Chiang Mai. I arrived in Chiang Mai the next morning after thinking of this goddess all night on the bus. Finally I rang her in the afternoon and she said, ‘There’s no work here, can I come to see you?’ You can guess my answer.

The next day she rang my motel to let me know where she was. She finally made it and was still absolutely beautiful. First she had a shower and we went to eat and it all went on from there. I told her I wanted to see her village and she told me she was very poor and wasn’t too sure about this. But I convinced her and also found out she has a little three year old daughter.

We went back to Khon Khaen, hired a car and went to her village. She was right… their house wasn’t much. The other village was a bit better off, but I was welcomed into the village and she talked about her life and how she wanted to build a house for her family. I looked at this and the next day I said I’ll build that house for you and your family, even if we don’t stay together… she and the village touched me so much. Things moved really fast over the next week and the village was all excited.

When it was time to head back to Bangkok, she wanted me to go to Pattaya to meet a couple of her friends. I had never been there and wasn’t interested as I don’t drink, smoke or do drugs. But we finally got there and she was in her element. We went to one of the bars and I told her I didn’t want to go in, but she said she wanted me to meet a friend who worked there, so we did. Anyway the friend wasn’t there so she called her on her mobile and we had to pick her up at a club and go out for dinner. I had to pay the club to take her out which I wasn’t happy about but we had a good time and the dinner was great.

But then my girlfriend went to another bar and as I wasn’t happy about it, she promised not to stay long. She knew some of the girls and they were great. She said she herself had worked in the bars a long time ago, but didn’t like it. We looked round Pattaya and I told her I didn’t like it at all and I’d rather be in the villages. We went back to Bangkok the next day.

I have sort of fallen in love with her and she with me I think. Back in Darwin I sent her an msm three times a day for the next ten weeks and sent more money over for the house. The building started and I got photos of it from her and was happy the house was going well. I told her I’d be back in December, but I couldn’t wait and after ten weeks have just been back to Thailand for another nine days.

It was great to see her again and we spent a couple of days in Bangkok before we went to the village. It was good to be back there and the top of the house was built and the workers were doing the bottom half. It really stood out and I was very proud to be doing something for the village as the money goes directly to all of them.

I had to take some things to my colleague’s wife’s village and so off we went. We arrived there late in the afternoon and the family was happy to see us. Anyway, things suddenly changed and me and my girlfriend were fighting. We